Chris Uggen's Blog: 1.3 seconds

Thursday, March 06, 2008

1.3 seconds

lifting at the local community center the other day, i catch sight of my lad from across the room. it takes about 1.3 seconds before i realize that i'm actually staring at a frickin' mirror rather than my son, which is bizarre and/or delusional because he's 17, 6'6", and considerably more angular than i am. still, the bemused/disgusted/resigned expression on his/my face is definitely all uggen.

this is the first, and almost certainly the last, time that i'll mistake myself for tor. i guess it constitutes the singular moment when our paths are crossing. a few people, such as the perceptive young woman he's been dating, have suggested that we look exactly alike. still, he's turning into a college dude, while i'm turning into a college dude's dad.

any stronger resemblance is tougher for me to see, since the official authorized family biography has drawn a straight line between me and esperanza, and between tor and his athletic, angular mother. it isn't just a physical thing: when my students spend an evening at my house, they see esperanza as my mini-me clone, while they don't know what to make of the lad.

but seeing him in my mirror -- if only for 1.3 seconds -- remixes my view of such things. i see my battles with tor in terms of my battles with my dad (and, let's be clear about this, i ain't just talkin' about verbal sparring around the dinner table) and how my dad surely battled with his dad. this brought me a big ol' bill cosby laugh, of course, foreseeing the gawdawful realization that will surely hit tor in a decade or two: oh crap, i'm turning into my father.

i'm trying to get a little analytic distance on this moment. all told, however, it is about the best 1.3 seconds i've had all year.


At 7:38 AM, Blogger Brad Wright said...

What a touching moment for you... Sort of a passing the torch into adulthood. Wow.

At 3:33 PM, Blogger S.S.STONE said...

Yes , very touching, a really wonderful post.Thank you for sharing these thoughts.


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