syllabus for seminar in federal prison survival

i'd like to think the bernard madoff and tom petters debacles will spur greater interest in white-collar and corporate offending among those studying organizations and criminology. of course, i had the same hopes for the enron debacle.

there's a good reason that white-collar and organizational deviance remains criminally understudied: there's precious little theory and even less insider knowledge to guide our research. i thought long and hard about writing a corporate crime dissertation, but i lacked both knowledge and instincts in the area (e.g., should i use sales, profits, or revenue to indicate performance? or is year-to-year growth in these characteristics more important? or maybe quarterly earnings data are needed).

still, one can learn a lot from the business press. for example, forbes is reporting on the tendency of elite federal criminals to feign substance use problems to reduce their sentences via the residential drug abuse program or RDAP. the story led me to larry levine's american prison consultants site, which offers a full array of services to the newly-convicted and terrified white-collar offender:

"By taking advantage of obscure Federal Bureau of Prisons (BOP)R.D.A.P. Policies, 18 U.S.C. 3621 loopholes, I can help those beingsentenced to Federal Prison, receive EXTRA TIME off their sentence; EVEN WITH NO EVIDENCE OF DRUG OR ALCOHOL ABUSE IN THEIR PROBATION SENTENCING REPORT (PSR)FOR A FREE CONSULTATION CALL ME NOW!"

one course that i'd like to take is the $850 orientation program titled fedtime 101. the site lists numerous testimonials, as well as a syllabus:

"American Prison Consulting's mission is to prevent you from being extorted, raped, assaulted, or killed while in prison."

"When I sentenced to seventy months I was shocked, my overpriced lawyer who told me I'd get probation dumbfounded, and my wife was panic-stricken. We made phone calls, searched the Internet, and found practically no useful information about the BOP. When I self-surrendered, they put me in with killers, bank robbers, and other violent hardcore felons. As a first-time white-collar inmate doing time for sending a fax...I could've been killed. When I got to the BOP and met Levine, the education he gave me about the BOP was priceless. I only wish I could've taken his program before I came in. I can't thank Levine enough for the peace of mind he's given me and my family. I'd recommend his services to anyone."

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN

CLUB FED History & Structure
BOP Program Statements/Regs
Custody/Security Classifications
Types of Federal Prisons
Visiting Regulations
Mail Regulations
Telephone Regulations
Disciplinary Sanctions (SHOTS)
Sanction Hearings
Administrative Remedies
Delaying Collection of Fines
Delaying Collection of Restitution
Inmate Trust Fund Accounts
Inmate Transfer Policies
Flying CON AIR
Furlough Transfers
BOP Staff Job Descriptions
BOP Staff Ranks & Pay Scales
BOP Staff Personality Types
Why Staff Lie & Dislike Inmates
Inmate Civil Rights
Suing A BOP Staff Member
Writing Up A Staff Member
Dealing With BOP Staff
Unit Team-Program Reviews
How To Survive A Prison Riot
Getting Extra Time Off Sentences
RDAP-The Drug Program
Prevent Being RAPED
Prison Living Conditions
The Daily Prison Grind
Your 1st Day What To Bring With
Inmate Personal Property
Inmate Etiquette & Politics
Dealing With Other Inmates
Avoiding and Spotting Informants
Dealing With Gang Members
Defusing A Confrontation
Prison Slang & Lingo
Avoiding Bad Prison Jobs
Getting A Lower Bunk Pass
Getting A Soft Shoe Permit
Work Assignments
Educational Opportunities
Medical Care
Medical Work Restrictions
Religious Services
Recreation Activities
Leisure-Law Library Usage
Food Service-The Dining Hall
Microwave Cooking Techniques
The Commissary Inmate Store
Temporary Release Furloughs
Staying Out of Solitary (The SHU)
Avoiding Goodtime Loss
How Goodtime Works
Calculating Release Dates
Half Way Houses-Reentry Centers
Home Confinement
Compassionate Release

while most inmate socialization occurs informally, first-time white-collar offenders are generally clueless about what to expect. mr. levine appears to have found a market niche serving a suddenly-vulnerable clientele. who knows? if you sign up now, you might be classmates with mr. madoff and mr. petters.