interim report on toxic substances control act

In keeping with the Toxic Substances Control Act provision of the 2009 Mojo Reclamation Project, I've been teetotalin' since January 1. Though I'd abstained throughout my graduate school years, there were still a few surprises. Five observations at the nine-month mark:

1. I don't miss it. I substitute drinks like diet A&W for beer and pomegranate juice for wine. Pom juice always seemed too expensive for everyday use, but it is far cheaper than good wine and far more drinkable than cheap wine. There is no substitute for Knob Creek bourbon, but fresh apple pie might come closest.

2. Restaurants suddenly seem tired and boring. I still enjoy hanging in taverns with friends and colleagues, but restaurant meals seem absurdly protracted. A teetotalin' friend actually brings books to help pass the long hours that precede the appearance of food. I'd rather just get up and do something.

3. The Interim Pants Elimination Program suddenly became more successful. After nine months, I've lost twentysomething pounds and the last brigade of interim pants has been withdrawn from the upstairs closet. I'm a spectacularly unsuccessful dieter, but finally got decent results after kicking up the exercise and cutting out the alcohol.

4. A bit stronger physically. My running miles increased about 10 percent and the max lifts are up a bit at the gym. I probably shouldn't work out at night, but those long runs under the stars serve as an effective non-toxic stress-buster.

5. A happy brain? It took a few months, but I started feeling a little sharper, quicker, and more clear this summer, especially when puzzling through geeky-fun research problems (e.g., trying to apply a new logit decomposition technique to a discrete-time hazard model with experimental data). I wouldn't make any claims without pre-test/post-test data, but I sure feel sharper.

Teetotalin' hasn't solved every problem, with insomnia and the email inbox proving especially resistant to attack. I'd like to think that my judgment is improving -- as dad or department chair. I'm doing a better job with the late-night father/son and father/daughter chats these days, but there's really little evidence that I've become a better father, scholar, or administrator. Overall, though, I feel good enough about how things are going to continue the experiment. The costs are low and the benefits are tangible.